SRS: 9th and 10th days after surgery

 Ooops, forgot yesterday. Well, I was dispatched and super tired!



So, yesterday was the last night in the hospital. I had some hot flashes again before falling asleep, making it slower but was able to sleep rather well anyway. The morning went pretty much by just waiting that am I really going to be released, and after I got confirmation around 10 am, I started little by little gather my things together and swap to normal clothes. I was pretty much ready around 1 pm, when I got my papers. The only problem with them was that the medical certificate for sick leave was written between 20.10. - 2.12., which wasn't what they promised me and told the nurse about that. I had monday 19th as sick leave in time tracking thingy at work already, so I couldn't use the certificate as is. After a half an hour or so, I got new, correct medical certificate with different dates. This time starting correctly from 19.10. but was written until 10.12. 😂 Well, whatever, one more week off work than what I thought. I was originally planning to be the week 49 on vacation, and now the sick leave will end on week's 50 thursday. Add vacation day to friday and done.

With papers sorted out, I walked longest distance (🤣) in a week to the reception and ordered a cab to railway station. Then, in the railway station grabbed some food and iced latte (Robert's coffee ice latte with raspberry syrup is super good btw!) and strolled to the train, being reminded about walking speed every other second as I really need to take it slow. And if I don't, my pussy will remind me about it.

And talking about pussy reminding things, sitting is also a thing it likes to remind not liking. Even with ring pillow, I need to shift position slightly after a while. I also went to grab normal coffee from restaurant car during the ride as it was getting really unpleasant to sit and I'm not even allowed to sit over one hour at a time. With that I was able to manage it, it was 1.5 hour long ride after all. When I got back to Tampere, my friend escorted me home as that was again longest distance in a while which I have walked so I didn't want to do it alone. It was actually long enough that I confirmed from physiotherapist that was it ok. And everyone said that it should. Main concern being fainting. Wearing mask did it's own thing as well, adding up with the dizziness, but I was able to take it off when I got outside from the railway station of Tampere.

After dropping some shit to home and not-so-brief toilet visit, I visited pharmacy as well as I need to have two different antibiotics for a week and the damn Klexane injection for 30 days. Took the pills and injection (which was much easier this time, took only a minute) and went to sleep. Had little bit hard time getting asleep but after I did, slept well.

Today I have been only alone at home, watching anime and reading manga while laying in bed and trying to keep up with the eating habits the hospital was able to make me learn already. And I think I have managed at least somewhat. I have had some weird headache the whole day but dunno, maybe it's just of getting proper coffee at last. Today's injection took only like 10 seconds so I'm seriously getting used to poking myself with needles.

Peeing has been little bit difficult today. I really need to push that anything comes out. It feels like the muscle control isn't really there yet and it's not releasing properly. The end of the tube might be bit scarred as well, making it's own problems as well. Both should get better with time though, today has been just quite annoying.

Took my first post-op full frontal nude as well and took better look of myself from the mirror. Gosh it looks good. And I noticed the point about dysphoria as well. I don't magically feel amazing, but instead of getting major dysphoria, I notice my mouth to turn into a smile :3 It's still healing but it's Correct™. The dysphoria was like that already though, that only in certain situations I was dysphoric in a first place. So now my mind can really start to heal as nothing as heavy as dysphoria is pushing it down anymore. I'm pretty sure that when I'm allowed to start HRT again, I'm going to bloom. I'm waiting that so much. I already shed some tears of joy when I got bouquet from my company today with flower delivery. I didn't know I was such a romanticist 😂.


I think I will start to write bit more rarely again, especially the recovery time at home is quite dull to write about. I have a checkup coming up next week anyway and maybe some thoughts will gather together during couple of days.

'Til next time~ 💜

Popular posts from this blog

Uncensored Tipsy Thoughts 5

Being drunk is interesting. It makes you think things from different perspective. Tonight, I have thought about the harsh contradiction in myself. In one end, there is the tech head. My work. Things I love to do with computers. Gaming. In another end, there are the girly things. Starting from makeup and clothes, ending to how I carry myself and how I observe world and imitate it. In third end, there is my bad side. How grim and self-reliant I am. And partly reflecting that, my ability to read people way better than I would like to. In the fourth end is what I want to show to the world. That I'm neutral, optimistic and liberal, can get along with everyone, I don't prejudge. I give certain amount of trust to everyone. And depending on your actions I judge you and you will either gain or lose trust. That is bit bad combination. In the history of mine, there are several occurrences when I have hitted below the belt with words very hard. I do it unconsciously when I'm pissed
Read more

SRS: 1 year later

 Wait, already? I visited HUS on wednesday, for year later inspection. Everything was fine according to the surgeon. And I realized how rough she has been all the time. I just haven't felt it before so it was bit of a shock. But, no problems with urinary retention or anything really, only occasional (rather intensive) sting of pain which lasts usually only couple of seconds. Sometimes longer, but less than minute and those are less intense. I'm guessing it relates to nerves healing and the surgeon said that they take time to heal as an answer to my pondering. It also looks like a pussy, like it should. I have next visit in two years, 3 years after surgery. I hope everything has healed completely then, though tactile feel is pretty much only thing lacking so. Talking about tactile feel, it is rather good nowadays. There's almost numb spots still, especially on top (between labia) and under (in the vagina) the edematous tissue. But the vagina, especially the deep end, labias
Read more

SRS: T-23 hours

 Oh gosh, less than a day. Tomorrow at this time I will be on operating table already. 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱 I was barely able to sleep last night for some reason. I took sleeping pill to get some decent amount of sleep but it only made me very calm and tired. So hopefully my body was able to rest at least. I got something like 2-3 hours of sleep, I think. I'm also pretty sure I won't be able to sleep much tomorrow night, I will be way too nervous. And wake up at 5am anyway. Last breakfast. Last cups of coffee. Last everything at home. Last moments of this era of my life. This is pinnacle of my transition, towards which I have lived (more or less) the past 10 years. I know the happier times will be in front of me, after some suffering. But even with pain, just the lack of dysphoria will make days so much brighter. My train will leave in 9:04 to the capital. I hope it won't be late, I have reserved only one hour from the train station to the hospital. I te
Read more