HRT: Second month
Wait, what? Already? Where that month went?
Well, not much has happened this month. Like the gynecologist said, let's go slowly. My boobs are about the same size, my face fat has moved a little more, more muscles has gone away. Most of the things has happened in my head.
I helped my cousin to move yesterday as I have truck driver's license and it was much easier to move with bigger car than van from Tampere to Valkeakoski. It underlined how much I have lost muscles. He had 16kg kettlebell, which I wasn't able to get up using only one arm. I have my finger power still pretty much intact so hanging it with two fingers wasn't any problem, but getting it anywhere above my hip required both hands and serious effort. 16kg kettlebell! So I wasn't wrong when I thought that most of the muscles has gone from my shoulders and hands as my shoulders has been quite sore today, as well as my lower back. But I will just say: Finally. Although that might make my work harder when installing new rack servers, but that's why we have power-aids, like lifting table.
I have noticed that my emotions aren't affected much, the way I feel is pretty much the same. I want to cry to same things, I desire same things etc. But what has changed is the amplitude. Hormones have amplified those emotions very much. I went to see Ready Player One and there was several moments when I cried more than three drops. Not much more than that but anyway. The emotional impact wasn't great enough that without hormones I would have been able to cry even one drop. So the difference is actually quite drastic. And the worst thing, I miss Certain Someone more than I have missed anyone in my life before. Although, I do feel happier generally, and otherwise my mood has been much better. So hormones amplifies all emotions, not just some of them. I feel more. Which wasn't exactly what I expected but this is even better thing than what I actually expected. I don't feel being emotionless anymore. My mindset also started to move again, I think even more like women do. Or I think so, at least I'm further away from the way men think anyway.
In the next month I will get hit to the face with laser again and my estradot will be raised to 75 micrograms. I hope I have more to say in the end of May.
Well, not much has happened this month. Like the gynecologist said, let's go slowly. My boobs are about the same size, my face fat has moved a little more, more muscles has gone away. Most of the things has happened in my head.
I helped my cousin to move yesterday as I have truck driver's license and it was much easier to move with bigger car than van from Tampere to Valkeakoski. It underlined how much I have lost muscles. He had 16kg kettlebell, which I wasn't able to get up using only one arm. I have my finger power still pretty much intact so hanging it with two fingers wasn't any problem, but getting it anywhere above my hip required both hands and serious effort. 16kg kettlebell! So I wasn't wrong when I thought that most of the muscles has gone from my shoulders and hands as my shoulders has been quite sore today, as well as my lower back. But I will just say: Finally. Although that might make my work harder when installing new rack servers, but that's why we have power-aids, like lifting table.
I have noticed that my emotions aren't affected much, the way I feel is pretty much the same. I want to cry to same things, I desire same things etc. But what has changed is the amplitude. Hormones have amplified those emotions very much. I went to see Ready Player One and there was several moments when I cried more than three drops. Not much more than that but anyway. The emotional impact wasn't great enough that without hormones I would have been able to cry even one drop. So the difference is actually quite drastic. And the worst thing, I miss Certain Someone more than I have missed anyone in my life before. Although, I do feel happier generally, and otherwise my mood has been much better. So hormones amplifies all emotions, not just some of them. I feel more. Which wasn't exactly what I expected but this is even better thing than what I actually expected. I don't feel being emotionless anymore. My mindset also started to move again, I think even more like women do. Or I think so, at least I'm further away from the way men think anyway.
In the next month I will get hit to the face with laser again and my estradot will be raised to 75 micrograms. I hope I have more to say in the end of May.